yet another flat
Last night i saw YAF (yet another flat). In fairness, a house. The very large double room was really nice. I’m talking good furniture, space, light green walls, space, south-facing windows, space,… The five housemates lovely. And, most importantly, all of my things would have fit!!
yet another no
So of course, this morning i get a text that i’m not going to be offered the room. This is the 13th place i have seen. The third one i would really like to live in. But, as it seems, i do not get to pick where i live. So i quit. I’ve had much too much stress in my life. Winters are always difficult for me. This one was quite harsh.
feeling too old for this $***
Of the 13 places i have seen, more than half were because girls were moving in with their boyfriends. It is impossible to describe how inadequate this makes me feel, given most of them are a decade younger than me. At 33, i am living alone. People constantly ask “Why can’t you move in with your boyfriend?” Nosy buggers. “Because we’re not there yet”. Feck off. It’s true though. We aren’t. When we do move in together, it will be for something much bigger than “I need a place to live”.
i quit, for now
Tonight, i was going to go see two more flats. Apparently they need someone to move in immediately, but i would need another month, if nothing else, to give notice. So I cancelled the viewings. I cannot take the stress anymore. I have also stopped looking for flats. I will look again after i get back from visiting family on 4th March. So I am looking at one month of limbo, after 3 weeks of immensely stressful and soul-sucking hunting for flats.
to be continued…
I will reactivate my flat hunting search in a month. Until then, I will spend time with friends, I will probably make another dress, I will go see my family, and devour a couple more books. Life’s not too bad. Just fecking complicated, and in dire need of winning the lottery.
snark & optimism
– “Lottery: a tax on people who cannot do statistics”
– “Yes, but even if it’s one in 13 million, it’s one in something, not none”
And i do have a lovely man who took me out to dinner tonight, for delicious steak (and ohmygod the chips, salad – sophie’s salad -, and aubergine! And chocolate caramel mousse! @flatironsteak | flatironsteak.co.uk), to cheer me up from all this stressful frustration. Well done!